Archives for June 15, 2007

Attitude Changes Reality

June 15, 2007 by

I read a great post today from Tony Gallegos. It was about one of my favorite topics – the Importance of having a great Attitude.

In 2004, I was in the Navy stationed aboard the USS John F. Kennedy (CV-67). We deployed for the Gulf in June. I left behind my husband, my children, my life.  The  ship spent the majority of its time in the Persian Gulf providing air support for the troops on the ground.

I will take this moment to digress and thank, from the bottom of my heart, all the servicemen and women and their families for their awesome service.

Every person who has ever been deployed has their stories about phone calls to home where spouses are worn thin, important dates are missed, holidays apart, and three year olds asking if you are ever coming home. In a situation such as this, as you can well imagine, it is easy to hate everything about life.

Nobody can live like that – much less be productive and perform the mission at hand.  This is what I learned.

You can either sit here and be angry and gain nothing positive from the situation, or you can sit here and take pride in your work, learn from the experience, and become a better person – either way, you’re still sitting here.

Different times call for different forms of resolve where our attitude is concerned. When the market is good, business is booming, we’re spending tons of time with our family, and there’s left over after the bills are paid, a good attitude is easy. When the chips are down, the hustle is harder, and stress is the diet of the day, it ain’t as easy – but this is time when it is most important.

Your reality – the place in space that you occupy- is molded and created almost completely by your attitude towards it. Try these.

  • Business is slow – perfect time to work on the marketing plan that is going to generate more business.
  • Money is tight – perfect time to review your budget and plan expenses.
  • Not enough clients to fill a work day – perfect time to take some of those continuing education courses that make you better qualified to serve them when the list fills up.

Like Tony, I am not advising you to put on “rose colored precious moments glasses and ignore the realities.” I’m just saying that a perceived negative reality doesn’t stand a chance against a healthy positive attitude.

Filed Under: Chrysalis Tagged With: ,

The Confessions of a (Relatively) Perfect Mom

June 15, 2007 by

I love being a mommy – it is truly one of my favorite things. My four daughters are a joy in my life and I wouldn’t trade them for a thing in the world. Ask them and they will tell you – I am the best mom in the world. In fact, I do consider myself the perfect mom.

***Begin playing sappy music***

McDonald’s is not a staple of our diet. We have family movie night. I am cautious of the movies they watch, clothes they wear, music they hear, and the friends they have.  We discuss values and citizenship. We see the dentist twice a year and the doctor for regular check ups. We discuss stranger safety. Chores are a must. School work is priority – even in the summer.

***Record playing sappy music scratches to a halt***

Let’s get real…I am a great mom, relatively.  While all the above statements are true, let me let you in on some more truths.

We rush in the morning to get to school on time. They probably watch too much TV.  The kitchen isn’t always clean. I don’t read to them for 30 minutes every night. Sometimes I just want to be left alone. They brush their teeth at least once a day, but definitely not after every meal. There is always laundry to be done. We don’t always eat together. I am ready for summer break to be over. Sometimes dinner comes out of a box. Their room is a mess and I am tired of fighting about it. I have made the mad dash to Wal-Mart to get supplies for a school project that is due the next day.

Why tell you all this? Because I believe I am not alone. I believe that there are a ton of mommies – probably most – out there who feel overwhelmed and under performed most of the time.  I believe that these moms (dads too?) carry around heavy guilt that makes the hardest job in the world even harder. I believe that we think we are the only ones dealing with these feelings and ask ourselves why we can’t have it “together” like the super mom who lives down the street (who, by the way, is probably thinking the same thing about you.)

I believe there are far too many of us asking ourselves, “What’s wrong with me?”

The answer – Nothing, except being human.

I believe our children deserve the very best we can give them. I don’t think that looks like perfection. I think it looks like unconditional love. Kids don’t care so much about “stuff” when they feel protected and cared for. Don’t believe me? Watch a kid’s face light up when they get the one present they wanted most.  Then watch his heartbreak when you won’t play with him. The toy means nothing without the love.

We spend so much time trying to be a perfect mom to the world and then feel like a failure when we can’t pull it off. Wouldn’t that time and energy be better spent on something you can do – like being the perfect mom to your kid?

Filed Under: Family, Parenting Tagged With: ,