Rituals and Routines

December 4, 2020 by

Deep work is the ability to focus without distraction on a cognitively demanding task. It’s a skill that allows you to quickly master complicated information and produce better results in less time.
~ Day 4 of the 28 Day Self-Growth Plan
Deep Work, by Cal Newport

First, let me thank you for your patience. I am also thanking myself for my own patience. This 28-day project isn’t just an attempt to achieve a new level of growth using 28 possibly well curated executive summaries. In fact, it isn’t that at all.

It is an attempt to prove that I can, in fact push publish every day. I think that sounds easier than what it actually is.

In my brain, there is A LOT that goes into pushing publish. There is content, appropriateness, ancillary repercussions, images, readability, relatability, accountability, spelling, grammar, attribution, keywords, excitement, time, snippets, fear, love, explanation, context, word count, timing, completeness, structure, reception, clarity, purpose, intention, the white spaces…

See, my brain is a super fun place…

However, I have a theory that it isn’t really all that complicated. I have a theory that suggests I have made it that complicated so I can have a ready-made excuse for not doing it. See, I got rid of all my legitimate excuses some time ago. What I didn’t let go of fully was my fear. But that can’t be the reason because, well, I have made a commitment to not let fear run my show. So, let me make this other reason.

It isn’t that complicated to push publish. Images and all that website stuff are easy – find them or *gasp* just don’t use them. Most of that other stuff assumes I make money doing this – I don’t. I mean, wouldn’t that be fine, but I write because it is who I am, not because it is what I do. So, if it sucks sometimes, so what? Don’t like it? Whatever, you got it for free. We can both try again tomorrow.

And that’s kinda what happened yesterday. I was in a headspace that was a tad overwhelming. I had a few choices that ranged from faking it to quitting and skipping the day. I decided to just say it – I can’t even today, I have given you what I have, I have given myself what I had, I’m going to go do something else now, we will try again tomorrow. And then I hit publish.

Then I started to work on clearing out the clutter in my brain. Fun fact, it didn’t work – but it did improve and that’s good enough for me. There’s no reason to think I can fix whatever in a day. More importantly, I am not broken. I am wondrous just the way I am and just happen to be the kind of person who regularly wonders, “How much better can I be?”

So as the universe is apt to do, today’s executive summary suggests that distracted work (shallow work) and multi-tasking are counterproductive to real cognitive work (deep work).

This is tough for me because my day to day is not typical. I have several work environments in my home and office. I am the COO of our home and our business. I am a full-time college student with a hybrid online/in person schedule. I have children, employees, friends. I have a husband who may or may not still be 15 years old and is the poster child for ADHD. In short, the only thing that is definite on my calendar is kid drop off and pick up from school – and even that isn’t always my responsibility.

For instance, right this very second, my assistant sent me a text about a work related issue, the dryer played its “hey, I’m done come get your clothes out before I wrinkle them” song, and my coffee needs a warm up. But I am in the middle of a sentence here and if I get up, I know there is a good chance I won’t be able to pick up this thought again because it’s a real time thought. But priorities…and now I am ankle deep in a dilemma of where to focus my attention.

In all honesty, I like it this way. So, I don’t like ALL of it. But when I consider the alternatives, this works for me. What I lose in structure and security I gain in freedom and flexibility.

But I don’t think Newport is wrong:

Deep work requires a distraction-free environment, a high level of concentration, and it ultimately improves your skills, which in turn leads to value addition…

When an individual switches from task A to Task B, his 100 percent attention does not automatically switch to the new task, some remains stuck at the original task A. This is attention residue…even if you complete task A before switching, part of your attention will still remain on task A for a while. Working in a semi-distraction state is counterproductive…you create a new target for your attention, and by seeing a task B you cannot accomplish at the moment, you will be switching back to task A, with task B left unfinished.

The answer in my opinion – block scheduling.

What’s the one thing that will not ever work in my life – block scheduling.

You may think this would frustrate me. In another life it would have. Not in this one. In this one, I understand that there is more than one answer. I also understand that while Newport is right, he is not the ONLY right.

I am thankful for this particular attention getter today. It has reminded me that it is time to consider my planner choice for 2021. In 2020 I switched from a paper planner to a digital planner using GoodNotes and BOSS Personal Planner. I am not opposed to this setup again. I am opposed to not checking out other options. So, it went on my list of things to do today.

Block schedules don’t work for me. But lists do and I have gotten much better at using them (damn dryer is making noise AGAIN – I can HEAR the clothes wrinkling!) Robust planners with daily pages and monthly overviews keep me focused without being confining and flexible without forgetting. The digital piece works for me because I take my iPad everywhere. Literally, I picked my newest handbag based on this singular fact.

Newport suggested that life be “rituals and routines.” I understand the premise. I am not interested in the implementation. There is almost always more than one way to do the thing…

Filed Under: Chrysalis Tagged With: , , ,

Platitudes and Wherewithal

October 17, 2017 by

There are all of these platitudes that people use
when trying to convince us that we’re better than ourselves.
The truth is, unless you have the
wherewithal to get off your ass and do it,
you’re not going to.

~Thom Williamson, Navy Buddy, 2004 – forever

I have been getting all my past writings together in one place in an attempt to become more organized and better service folks who ask, “what have you written.” I discovered two things I found interesting.

First, I have no idea how many Turn Around Tuesdays I’ve done. However, the first TAT was published over a decade ago on April 3, 2007. Ten years, depending on how you account for time off, I have been sharing a quote, turning it around, and having coffee with you. That’s a really long time.

Second, I still have no idea how many TATs I have done. I didn’t know when I had written the first one. I am embarrassed to tell you how long it took me to find it. Unbeknownst to me, I was dangerously close to losing the entirety of the first seven years. I missed its 10th birthday. Realizing how flippant I have been about the whole thing is curious.

I have had a lot of support through the years. I was a better steward of some it than others. But my path always turned into a jungley mess of convoluted. There are a bunch of influences there – some ridiculous, other therapy worthy – but all topics for another day. Regardless of the ancillary, the end result has been the same; I have been blessed with a lot of convincing platitudes and still couldn’t get off my ass and do it. As usual, I am betting I am not alone.

Today I want to encourage you to consider your influences. Thought I was gonna say get off your ass? I was. In fact, I did and deleted it. In the typing, it occurred to me that’s the very thing we just discussed wasn’t enough – someone telling another what to do. The thing that moves those unfinished things we have created in or around ourselves is not platitudes, it is wherewithal. I am going to tell you that you have it, but you already know that. No amount of me telling is going to push past the absolute siphoning effect negativity or doubt has on the energy required to step into our best selves. But, when we find the thing that’s holding us down on the couch, we can start getting some work done.

Thanks for the coffee,

~A

Filed Under: Turn Around Tuesday Tagged With: , ,

Thanks For Making Me A Fighter

August 12, 2011 by

Revised and updated 9/2/18

Alrighty, so I already know I am going to regret using that title when I decide to post my Rocky Balboa “let me tell you something you already know” post or “The 10 ways I do and don’t want my kids to be like Christina Aguilera”. But, in my attempt to live more in the here and now, I am running with it – even if, while sincere, it is a bit overstated.

It has been an amazing week. It started with this little “damn I shouldn’t have eaten that pizza after midnight/Jerry Maguire” post {In My Own Skin}. It grew into a wonderfully supported and seemingly universally guided fireball of affirmation. I love it when you make decisions and it seems like the whole existence has been called down to confirm you choice. It doesn’t happen to me very often, so I enjoy it when I can.

I am going to the gym, working out, wearing sunscreen and getting serious about finances (for starters I quit buying smokes). This whole process, in the beginning is total love/hate. Also, it can be a bit overwhelming because there are tons of folks out there who are more than happy to tell you how they think you should handle your business. But I digress. Here are

Folks I Follow so I can be a Better Badass

@parentxperiment – One of my 2 favorite finds this week. So, I am getting ready for my first walk in forever. Really looking for a great time and I plan on being gone for awhile. I really don’t want any boom-shocka-locka music or learning the power of our inner beauty and connecting with our soul glow session. So, I peruse the podcast and come across The Parent Experiment. Hosted by Lynette Carolla (wife of Adam Carolla) and Stefanie Wilder Taylor (not the wife of James Taylor), these ladies and their guests talk about being mommies. No, seriously, they talk about BEING mommies. This isn’t fluff net, suitable for the whole family, I’ll bet my preschool resume is cooler than your preschool resume kind of show. I love it, it rocks and I am a fan. They made 11 1/2 miles in two days seem like a walk to the mailbox.

@100daysrealfood – The other of my 2 favorite finds this week (hat tip to Rocky). Lisa Leake  is a North Carolina wife and mommy of two of the prettiest little girls. She is waging war (and winning) against processed food. Yeah, so there are a bunch of folks like this, I know. But I like Lisa. She has the heart of a teacher – rarely do I find her waving a billy club to beat her readers in the head. She gets the kid thing. She gets the budget thing. She gets the balance thing. She gets a whole lotta crap. And she is only a little snarky, no matter what anyone else says about her.

@couponmom – OK, so I almost didn’t post this one because I don’t think it is an actual manned twitter account. GASP!! I know. But, when I thought about its usefulness in what it is, I figured, what the hell, it’s my blog and I will post it if I want to. This twitter stream is full of updates on some of the best deals and discounts.  Drug stores, groceries, clothing – you name it – if there is a deal, it flutters through, click, bang done. I could really get into this saving money business (did I mention I am in real estate :/) (*This is no longer that account so the link has been removed)

@geekend – one of the coolest things to ever happen to Savannah. Our Creative Coast has outdone themselves this time. While the actual Geekend isn’t until November (October if you are going in Boston), this twitter feed will give you plenty of geek to bridge the gap. Those freaking copper magnets kept my eyeballs glued to the screen – and I can’t figure out why. If you ever need a forward, cutting edge thought, or need some inspiration for your own blow out ideas, this twitter stream is rich with opportunity.

@SavCraftBrew – The whole reason Geekend is only one of the coolest things in Savannah. The Savannah Craft Brewfest makes me want to quit my day job, develop a master line of micro brews and force the Savannah Area Convention and Visitors Bureau to let me be Coastal Brew Diva. I am really embracing this healthier, wholer life – but, you are gonna pry my beer from my cold dead hands. The smokes, you can have – you ain’t gettin’ my beer. Maybe I will save enough money on coupon mom to make the tickets to the BrewFest free…and I am pretty sure I will have worked out enough to afford a teeny weekend of calories. Pop a cold one, I’ve earned it!

@brandipearl – When this chick and I met, we didn’t know each other at all. It didn’t matter. Brandi is such an open, warm, sincere, person, making friends is easy – especially if you are in line for the bar at a kick ass ReTechSouth party.  Brandi is my kind of people. She is, well, Brandi. Oh and she is also the Brains in @MauraNeill’s zombie Apocalypse team. Which is good for Maura. Brandi will do well in the “make you laugh,” “hold down the fort,” and “the kick zombie ass” departments. I’d take her to the CraftBrew Fest.

Filed Under: Paraphernalia Tagged With: , , , ,

Little Changes = Big Results

June 18, 2007 by

Do you know how often I hear, “What time did you _______?”
Insert into the blank

  • send that email
  • write a blog post
  • comment on a website
  • anything that has a timestamp.

Bunches.  Most people don’t notice the 3:30AM ish time – but when they do, they have questions.

Yes, I am typically up by 3 or 4 in the morning.  But I am typically asleep by 11PM.  I learned quite some time ago that I am super productive during the early morning hours.  I don’t require a whole lot of sleep.  If I sleep too much, my brain and body gets lazy.

The thing that interested me the most is that I wouldn’t get the same questions if I stayed up until 1 or 2 and was up at 6 or 7.

This difference in perception made me wonder – how many people lose out on big gains because they are stuck doing it the way they have always done it, or the way it “ought” to be done?

We often think we are not as productive, happy, energetic, accomplished as we could be because of outside influences – market, weather, circumstance.  But, what if it’s not any of those things.  What if it’s you?

  • Sounds crazy to get up at 3 – you might be missing your peak time.
  • Can’t imagine sleeping later and staying up till after midnight – that could be where your stride is.
  • Do you need to start a little earlier and stay a little later so you have extra time a lunch to relax – or even sleep?
  • Maybe when you take a shower, eat breakfast, or any part of routine is out of whack.
  • Do you read enough?
  • Do you listen enough?
  • Do you sleep enough?
  • Do you eat enough?

Take a look at the way you run your day.  Is it all that it could be?  Have you tried making it more effective in the past but could never seem to quite make it work?  Think outside of the guided path – what little changes could make a big difference in your productivity?

Filed Under: Chrysalis Tagged With: , ,

Imagination Sparks Creativity

April 3, 2007 by

“. . . you can’t depend on your eyes
when your imagination is out of focus.”

– Mark Twain,
A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court

Spring is here!  Aside from the pollen, it is a wonderful time of year.  The window at my desk finds more children playing now that the weather is nicer.  Work is slowed by the distraction, but the added inspiration is worth the wait.

A child’s energy can often spark the imagination.  They force us out of our “adult brain” box.  Trees become castles, bikes are fast horses, and bushes become the jungle of peril.  The art of make believe creates a wealth of ideas and problem solvers.

These are two of the things most of us would say we need more of in business and in life.  Many times we are paralyzed by that project that won’t wrap up or that issue that has no resolution.  Frustration makes it worse.  Productivity and success suffer.

Take a minute to enjoy the spring.  Watch the kids play, the flowers bloom and the sun shine.  Exercise your imagination and watch your accomplishments soar!

Filed Under: Turn Around Tuesday Tagged With: ,